ID: Lost and Found

It was on a Sunday when I found out that my Identification Card, or more shortly called as ID, was not on it's green ID card holder with a sling provided by my school. My initial reaction was shock, of course. I knew how tedious it is when a school property, such as a library card or an ID, would be lost. You'd have to  file an affidavit of loss to an attorney, you'd have to provide a new picture, and the list just goes on and on. I know these stuff because I've experienced accompanying my friends to go through this "legalization" stage of declaring a loss. And in most cases, it isn't just the ID that was lost on the process, along with those would be your time (for studying, perhaps) or a considerable sum of money (for booksales, perhaps).

Anyhow, the difference this time was that, it was my ID that was missing. Most people who know me would probably say I am a sentimental person. And that includes being sentimental to, well, material things. On the back portion of our school ID, it had these series of boxes that corresponds to the Semester and School Year. Every semestral enrollment, we would let the librarians sign the respective box. That would indicate you've been officially enrolled in that semester. I recalled how I made those simple boxes as motivations to really pursue it till the last box. And with every box that got signed in red ink, so does my sentimental value to that ID card - especially now that I am down to my one last box.

But again, on that very morning of a Sunday, it was like I lost a precious thing to me. I thought I was cursed -  with losing ID cards, that is. I lost my ID card back when I was at my last year in high school...the same incident that happened! Tell me I'm not cursed.

But that is not the reason why I composed an entry about my lost ID. This isn't a talk-about-the-weather type of entry.

Going back to that frozen scene of finding out I lost my ID, I then forced myself to recollect and retrace the latest bit of memory I had with it. Was it on the internet shop? Did I left it in my bag? I rummaged but found nothing. I asked the internet shop clerk, they found nothing of sorts. Where could I have left it? I was at wit's end. I was losing hope. I was frustrated with how my memory served me with these stained-glass thoughts. I asked God where I could have put it. I asked Him as if a toddler asking her mother to give her that doll on the toystore...fervently and like losing all hope. I even wanted to curl into a ball, assume a fetal position and just, degenerate.

I prayed to God. I asked Him to help me remember and find my ID. I asked my apologies to Him how I would pridefully show the back portion of my ID so that anyone could see that I have only one unsigned box left. I didn't know losing that school property would offer me so much realization.

I told Him, "Lord, if this is Your will, and that You are telling me something through this situation, please help me understand what it is.". I told Him that.

God really never fails to amaze me. Sometimes, His answers take time, and by time I mean a long time (for the human mind trapped in the space-time continuum). But it could also come in a split second, like when you turn your eyes to the bulletin board of your Student's Affairs Office after you've been denied by your librarians saying they haven't found a card with my face and name on it.

There was it. My name. Under the Found Items section. How silly of me not considering about the Lost and Found Section. But sometimes, silly is all you can be after you've realized how you've become so focused on the problem and overlooking what God is already saying to you.

Another realization will be applied in a romantic way. I already notice eyeballs rolling. Nevertheless, the understanding came up to me. Maybe, my significant other is like my lost ID. I kept on looking for him on all the wrong places, as I did looking for my ID on the internet cafe, and library, and my bag. And because with every search comes futile results, I would resort to doing 'silly' things, and thinking about 'silly' thoughts (Reference note: the 'curling-into-a-ball-and-just-degenerate' part).

But alas, amidst all these things, it is really important to still consult God's guidance. Because He is always telling us something. Asking for His guidance and will isn't the last step, in fact, it is only the beginning. Most people, including myself, miss the second step. And that is to TRUST that He is really guiding us to the right path. It entails us to put our faith on Him that we would soon find what it is that we are missing - just as I have found my missing ID.