New Life at Vermont

I would have told you I was writing this in some fancy yet also quaint coffee shop in Cebu City sipping my favorite salted caramel frappucino, but no, I am not. One because I am not in Cebu City anymore, and (2) I am not supposed to drink caffeinated beverages now.

I am writing this entry after months of hiatus, in our humble apartment here on a small city of northeastern part of the United States, called Newport. Not only that,

• I am happily married now to the man whom I call my best friend.
• Three months after the wedding, we have been gifted by God with the news that I am indeed pregnant despite of me being diagnosed with PCOS.
• Four months after the wedding, we both migrated to the United States. I stayed for 6 weeks in Florida for training while he stayed with his aunt at New Jersey.
• Last March 2021, we then moved to Newport, Vermont where we are now working as RNs in different healthcare institutions.

Needless to say, God has been so good to us. The journey was not easy to say the least, you know that. We both waited for more than three years for this. A lot of heartaches in between and some challenges here and there. But it is true that those who wait for the Lord will really see His goodness in the land of the living. 

Though I waited for so long, I realized now why it was so. When I met Nico, it was the resolution of all my fruitless searches. All those years of heartaches and reverberating questions of "why" and "how long" now seemed to make sense. Praise is all I can say for the God who has orchestrated all things beautifully in His time.

Why Are You Sending Me There?

"Why are you sending me to America, Lord?" My heart was unsettled by this question. "It is crucial for me to know your purpose for sending me there, Lord. What is it?"

A few Saturdays back during our small group meeting, we were exhorted by our leader that today's session would just be dedicated to us spending time with the Lord one on one, to have a  heart to heart talk with the Lord. At first I thought, spend time with God? Isn't that what I always do? So we were told to find a quiet place somewhere and meditate on the Lord and in his word. With our bibles on hand we did what we were told. I was eyeing that place near the stage but found another friend heading that way too so I politely gave way and headed to another direction.

I was looking around and found a vacant spot near the exit door to the terrace of our church. I positioned myself in such a way that I faced the glass door which has the view overlooking the city. I noticed a familiar view. This place had the exact same view I had when I received the news that I passed the board exams for nursing 4 years ago. Now, I am here once again, looking at the same view I gazed at that evening, just a floor lower now. As I sat there, I thought of God. I pondered on him like he was just beside me, like a friend. I thought, Wow God, this is it. Your faithfulness has carried me this far. I hold two licenses now, one was what you gave me four years ago which made me practice as nurse in the Philippines, and the other, to practice in the United States. Both licenses are wrought about by grace, both licenses carry testimonies of your goodness and unfailing provision. Four years ago I have found you faithful to give me that which I have prayed for so long, to be a nurse. Right here, in this very sanctuary, right where the Gospel also finally made sense to me and I received Christ as my Lord and Saviour. This was a fateful place indeed, to sit here now when I'm at the threshold of a new life waiting for me in America, with the man whom God has given me to love and cherish, and if He wills, to serve the Lord with him in ministry as a helpmate.

But is that all the reason why you're bringing me there? To follow the footsteps of typical of that of an OFW (Overseas Filipino Worker)? That is, to work as a nurse, marry a godly man, have a family of our own, send money back to my homeland, retire, ..., die? The thought alarms me. No that cannot be it. I refuse to live my life like a standardised formula for moneymaking. The wordiness of that formula is a slap to 1 John 2:15-17. I refuse to simply conform.

Surely the Lord has greater purposes for me to coming to America. But What could be It?

My eyes were looking at the wonderful view of Cebu City at night, but my mind was adrift of to the heavens. I wanted to press on so much my heart inquires of the Lord for his purpose. I need to know it, I need to know his purpose, his divine will, so that I might not waste my life over some 'standardised formula' and how people will tell me how I should live my life.

As of this writing, I have not yet fully grasped his answer. I am confident he will tell me eventually, through whatever means he will use, for as long as he will be glorified in the process and in the answer, I will be appeased to wait upon it. Confident that he will prepare me for his answer, and equip me to carry those out.